If you’ve ever visited the gym, you’ve probably had at least one person catch your eye. If you’re like many other people, you may have wondered how you could potentially approach that person and become involved in some way. It’s possible to meet your date at the gym, but you have to go about it properly. These tips will help you pick up a great gym date.
Don’t Use the Gym to Find Hookups
It’s extremely tempting to proposition someone at the gym. After all, working out has a certain aura of attractiveness to it, and many people wear more revealing clothes than they would otherwise so as not to overheat. However, overall, the gym is a very bad place to go for casual sex.
When most people go to the gym, they’re not thinking about sex. They’re thinking about how to get through a workout and improve their capabilities. Approaching them out of nowhere for sex is rude and far overreaches your authority.
There’s nothing wrong with noticing that some of your gym mates are extremely attractive. However, unless you’ve already made prior arrangements, that’s definitely not the thing you want to lead with. Instead, lead with a desire for friendship.
Keep Your Attention on the Long Goal
What’s your idea for the long-term goal with this person? Do you want to pursue a long-term relationship? Will you be totally okay if you only go on one date and the relationship fizzles out? Do you want to develop a sort of no-strings-attached, friends-with-benefits relationship?
There are all sorts of ways to have a relationship, whether platonic, romantic, sexual, or a mix of the three. Once you’ve determined your personal long goal, make sure you stay in tune with that goal unless you find a very compelling reason to change it.
Additionally, remember that people are much more than just goals. One of the main goals you should have when you’re approaching someone at the gym is simply to get to know that person. When that’s in the front of your mind, you’re much less likely to come off as awkward or weird.
Build a Friendly Relationship First
First off is to just become friends with the person. Just having a good friend at the gym is great for a variety of reasons. For example, you may be able to keep each other accountable, carpool to the gym, and give each other encouragement.
If this ends up being the full extent of your relationship, so be it. You made a new friend, and that’s amazing. The most important part of this part of the process is that you don’t just view it as a bridge to eventually dating or having sex with the other person. Sometimes making a friend is worth the time and effort.
However, this doesn’t preclude the relationship from eventually moving to those options, if applicable. Make a friend and see where things go from there. It’ll probably surprise you what you end up becoming with this person.
Be Aware of Other People’s Boundaries
The gym is a very public place, and it’s not one where most people are interested in having sex or starting a romantic relationship. More than even many other places where relationships often start, like clubs, you need to cut a wide berth around social and personal boundaries.
In general, it’s extremely bad form to walk up to someone and ask them if they’re interested in having sex with you. Why would that be any different in the gym? More than likely, the people in your gym have an unspoken boundary that they don’t want you asking to have sex with them right off the bat.
This is another reason to become friends with someone before asking them about sex. When you’re friends, you’ll know whether they have a more casual or formal approach to dating and having sex. That way, you have a much lower risk of offending your new friend with your questions.
Make Sure You’re Ready for a Sexual Encounter
You may eventually reach a point where your gym partner expresses interest and you reciprocate it. When that happens, it’s good to be prepared.
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