The Motion in the Ocean: Does Size Matter?

The Motion in the Ocean: Does Size Matter?

Bigger isn’t always better, no matter what advertising and pornography may have led you to believe. Fears abound among penis-owners and whether or not theirs is “normal” and able to satisfy a lover. But despite a culture-wide fixation with phallus size, research shows that size isn’t the only thing that matters, it’s all about how you use it! The average size for a penis is between five and seven inches (erect), give or take a few centimeters. As with other physical preferences, not everyone likes or desires the same thing in a penis.

In fact, a look at dildo sales reveals that women often opt for moderately sized models — around 6-8” rather than the 9-12” models so commonly on display in sex shops. Most of the nerve endings in the vagina are around the surface, not deep inside. The exaggerated buzz around the sensation a big dick brings may come in part from the sensation of fullness, but again, that doesn’t guarantee an orgasm or even pleasure for everyone. Penetration alone rarely leads to orgasm without clitoral stimulation, so don’t question your size if you’re pounding away and not getting much response from your partner. You probably need to change your speed and maneuvering and add a lot more foreplay. Almost everyone would agree that they’d rather have a lover who’s considerate and generous in the bedroom rather than simply well-endowed.

If you’re on the lower side of the average, you can do everything possible to maximize what you’re working with. At the end of the day, if you’re not sexually compatible, it’s best to move on. Size is relative; one person’s small is another’s medium, and one person’s medium is just right. Understanding their needs and getting creative with how you stimulate them is more likely to give them sexual satisfaction, rather than just having a big one to impress them with.

Is there such a thing as too big?

Yes, absolutely! All bodies are unique, and sizes of orifices also vary from one individual to another. Some people have vaginal canals that are on the narrow side, and some have rectums that are especially “tight.” They may or may not prefer to be penetrated by a partner with a large member, but it’s likely that extra lubricant and careful positioning may be in order to accommodate both partners. Friction can be a good thing, but too much can cause chafing and tears. 

If your partner is extremely well-endowed and you’re finding intercourse overwhelming, there are a few things you can do. Before he enters, it’s vital to ensure that you’re extremely aroused. The more tense and nervous you are to receive that large package, the more difficult it’ll be to deliver. Try some breathing exercises before you play to put your body and mind at ease. A few yoga poses beforehand can be relaxing and also prepare your body to stretch a bit. Lubricate generously, with a thick, viscous formula. A super-silky hybrid lube feels most similar to the fluid your body naturally produces upon arousal. Supplement what you’ve got to work with to help things go smoothly. 

If facing a second time with Mr. Big is too daunting after the first try, you can try using dilators. By using these softly curved tapering dildos, you can help your body get used to larger members gradually. If it still just isn’t happening, don’t forget that penetration is only one menu option for sex. With mouths, hands, toys and tongues, you and your large friend can still enjoy a varied and vivid sex life together.

Can I make my penis larger?

Don’t believe those spam emails. The answer is yes, technically. There is a surgery that makes your penis longer, but to be frank, it isn’t fun. Since it involves severing ligaments and possibly redistributing fat, a longer penis may not deliver reliable erections and may have an uneven appearance. The claims of many enlargement products are largely unfounded and unproven, but there are many tricks to temporarily pump up the volume of your penis and make the most of what you have.

How do I make the most out of my penis?

Penis pumps, most commonly used to treat erectile dysfunction, can temporarily make the penis appear thicker and fuller. The vacuum technology will increase blood flow to the penis, giving it a nice, pumped up appearance and helping the owner maintain an orgasm. Another pleasant side effect of penis pump use is that it feels great. The suction simulates fellatio, and many users enjoy masturbating with a penis pump. Pump manufacturer Bathmate claims that the vast majority of their users reported longer or better erections after two months of regular use. 

Pumps may be used with or without a cock ring. After pumping, slide one around the base of the penis to keep the blood brought to the surface in place. If used without a pump, wearing the ring during sex will still prohibit blood flowing away from the penis, making the erection as firm and thick as possible. 

Similarly, creams that encourage blood flow to the surface of the skin will also maximize the look and feel of the penis. Many supplements contain proprietary blends of ingredients like L-arginine, niacin, and Yohimbe extract, which increase blood flow, sensitivity and stamina.

Another fun option to incorporate into your routine is a hollow strap-on. These toys are fun for everyone, whether large, small or non-existent. Users can insert their penis inside and provide their lover with the experience of having sex with a differently-sized partner. If size isn’t a concern, one can use the dildo for double penetration or even to keep going during the refractory period after orgasm. Hollow strap-ons can also be filled with liquid and put in the freezer or warmed up for sensation play. They’re a great toy to keep in your arsenal, no matter what kind of parts you have.

What are the best sex positions for people with small penises?

Any position that allows for leverage will make smaller members go deeper and feel fulfilling to the recipient. Doggy style is a great option, as the penis-haver can grip the hips of their lover to thrust deeply. Cowgirl and reverse cowgirl are also a favorite, as it allows the person on top to really sink down on the phallus. If he wants to be on top, the recipient can hold their legs together to create a tighter fit while he sits with one knee on either side of their body. Preventing slippage is key, so a position aid can help you get as close to each other as possible. 

BDE (big dick energy) is all about attitude. You don’t need to have a giant schlong to get along! You just need to move with confidence and pay attention to your partner. It also doesn’t hurt to get really good at going down! The man who can please their partner through a variety of different methods is sure to be remembered as a better lover than one who puts little effort into learning to use their penis effectively. Pleasure is relative and unique, and good things can come in all types of packages.